Cornify
Sharkify
Lollify
♚ king ♚

if opposites attract why aren’t i covered in hot people right now

heyreallygiger:

if i ever met satan the first thing i would say is “did it hurt…when you fell from heaven??” It would be hilarious. The next thing I would do is probably burst into flame and get impaled dozens of times but it would still be hilarious

expansioned:

i hate crying myself to sleep because you are not worth any tear i spend

claphne:

send help

imsoshive:

brigwife:

hotsuburbandad:

tourettes:

why do people say innocent animal do guilty animals even exist 

image

image

follovver:

people who dont wet their toothbrush before using it are strange and should not be trusted

theamericankid:

Where is the “stepped on lego” or “stepped on pronged plug”?

vinebox:

getting ready for the first day of school like

h0llo:

ive stolen this line and used it so many times

h0llo:

ive stolen this line and used it so many times